Teresa's Tattoo


Comedy / Crime

IMDb Rating 4.6 10 385

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Uploaded By: FREEMAN
February 03, 2021 at 06:06 AM



Tippi Hedren as Evelyn Hill
Kiefer Sutherland as Roadblock Officer
Sean Astin as Step-Brother
720p.WEB 1080p.WEB
830.51 MB
English 2.0
23.976 fps
1 hr 30 min
P/S 44 / 77
1.51 GB
English 2.0
23.976 fps
1 hr 30 min
P/S 50 / 82

Movie Reviews

Reviewed by culwin 5 / 10


If you want to see dumb people, see Dumb and Dumber - at least that movie's funny. This movie is a total waste of Lou Diamond Philip's acting ability (but may be C Thomas Howell's best movie). This girl is kidnapped but accidentally dies so her kidnappers kidnap another girl who looks like her. The kidnappers are dumb, the people who rescue her are dumb, everyone involved is dumb, and for some reason everyone has corny accents and overacts. This movie could have been good with some good writers and some good actors, but as it stands it's just another un-funny comedy.

Reviewed by camraman 4 / 10


I happened upon this movie at a pay-per-view movie site. Seeing an opportunity to watch a movie without heading to the video store was very appealing. So, after reviewing 10 or 12 titles, I settled on Teresa's Tattoo partly because of the premise, partly because of actor Lou Diamond Phillips- The Big Hit, Stand and Deliver.

What was really interesting was seeing a number of popular actors in this movie that are uncredited as the top billers in the print ads- Joe Pantoliano, Teppi Hedren and more- executing a poorly directed script. This is probably a movie they would like to disassociate themselves.

The movie, as a whole, was poorly executed as an entertainment vehicle. The script lacked the comedic flow necessary to evoke substantial laughter from this viewer. There were a few funny moments (particularly the desk sergeant/police officer scene with Teresa/Gloria (Adrienne Shelley)), but most of the scenes fell flat.

Rating: 4/10

Reviewed by bkoganbing 2 / 10

Cashed In Some Favors

Teresa's Tattoo was Julie Cypher's second and last effort as a director we can all hope. My guess is that Lou Diamond Phillips, her husband at the time must have cashed in a bunch of favors from his Hollywood friends to get his wife this gig as a feature director. Her first effort was a short back in 1990.

A whole lot of people who came to prominence in the Eighties were gathered together for this inept comedy about a pair of doppleganger girls, one of whom dies while in the custody of kidnappers. Seems as though she's wearing earrings that contain holograph messages with data on the space program. Though who might have wanted it in 1995 with the Cold War over is beyond me.

Anyway poor Adrienne Shelley who plays the dead original kidnap victim and her lookalike who some gangsters hired by the Feds (yes, you read that right)grab instead because they think this is a ransom snatch proves a good deal smarter than any of the people trying to kidnap or rescue her. She's a math major, what would you expect?

This film is like a class reunion, look at the cast members, C. Thomas Howell, Casey Siemaszko, Nancy McKeon, Lou Diamond Phillips, Matt Adler, Joe Pantoliano, all came up about ten years earlier. Even Kiefer Sutherland has an unbilled part as a deputy sheriff and he could certainly be considered a contemporary.

The jokes fall flatter than Dorothy Gale's Kansas plains, everyone looks pained, some like Lou Diamond Phillips who know they're in a gobble gobble contest make up for it by overacting outrageously. Lou looked like he was in dress rehearsal for the part he had in The Big Hit which was a much funnier film.

Kiefer Sutherland was the smartest guy in the bunch, he didn't take any billing for this.

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